Today I woke up and didn’t feel like being here. At my desk I mean 😅
I didn’t want to get out of bed.
I didn’t want to take out my laptop.
I just didn’t want to do anything all thanks to exhaustion. I have had a rough week thanks to sleep deprivation.
Yeah, some days are like that. And today I want to talk about those days and other ugly parts of remote work and freelancing we don’t often talk about.
If you have found yourself wondering or even asking whether it’s always rainbows and sunshine in the remote work world, the answer is ‘No’. Keep reading to find out the unspoken truths a lot of us quietly carry.
Sleep Deprivation & Boundary Creep
I figured let me start with this one because it’s poking at me the hardest right now. Working remotely on multiple projects with multiple clients singlehandedly can take its toll on you. If you are having to juggle client work across different timezones, its only a matter of time before you start experiencing some fatigue and risking burnout.
Then there is the boundary creep. Let me explain this one. You know many of us remote work professionals like to talk about how we have so much freedom. But what many of us do not like to admit is how this freedom often backfires and translates to more time spent in our corner offices pouring in more hours into our work, and less and less into the life around us.
This is often true of myself especially lately as I have been working on multiple projects with multiple clients. I have found myself working from around 9am to 9pm, only breaking to go pick up my son from school and sometimes even waking up in the middle of the night to meet some deadlines.
The result of such a routine is not pleasant. Less quality time spent with my child even though we are living in the same house and that can also come with its own consequences. And don’t even get me started on how sluggish and irritable I feel when I haven’t slept well.
The Pressure to Always Be On
My clients in the US are most active in the later parts of the day. My clients Down Under are most active when I am supposed to be lost in my dreams. And with the rest of my clients in between we are trying to find the best time that is not lunchtime or school run for them or myself.
Because I work from home and need to serve and show up for all of my clients, in the best and fairest way possible, I find myself struggling to seperate work and rest. Even when I do make time to rest, I have this guilt that tends to creep in and a little voice that seems to whisper that I could be doing more with my time.
I feel like the pressure I put on myself sometimes is a little too much and I know I am not the only one who has realised that they have to try a little extra hard to be intentional about giving themselves that downtime.
The Feast or Famine Cycle
Unless you are employed in a full time position, income in remote work and freelancing can be quite inconsistent. One month you are literally turning down work, and another you are getting anxious over an invoice you sent 5 minutes ago and are already wondering whether it got lost in the wind.
Even in good months, you can find yourself getting anxiety regarding what lies ahead in the coming months because bills are consistent and don’t stop piling up. This can make it difficult to make long term financial plans because you need to create a huge buffer for those down months and plan for expenses that would need to be covered.
No matter how old you are in the freelancing and remote work scene, you know this cycle can drive you mad! OK, let me speak for myself on this one. It may not be true for everyone. Personally, sometimes it just makes me want to pull my hair out and it’s honestly nobody’s fault. It comes with the journey.
Isolation and Disconnection
Some time last year I went through an episode of loneliness in my work. I longed for networking and human connection real badly and this was actually one of the reasons I found myself applying to get into a postgrad degree program.
When you work remotely, there are hardly any water cooler chats and sometimes we take those casual check ins for granted. It’s easy to go for days without any meaningful interaction, especially if you live alone. And before you know it, your mental health is taking a hit and you are wondering why you are chronically sad.
It’s the disconnection from others and unless you are intentional about building relationships and connections with others beyond your laptop, you will find yourself battling loneliness at heightened levels.
Unstable Support Systems
I always tell my aspiring remoties that you are not just looking for remote work. You are running a business. And unfortunately, it’s the business of you by you, for you and most of the times, with just you. You have to do everything.
If something breaks, crashes, or glitches… there’s no IT guy. There’s just you, Google and ChatGPT. You are your own tech support, admin, customer service, marketing, sales, even therapist! Juggling these multiple hats can be overwhelming.
I have days when I just don’t want to create content for LinkedIn, when writing a post honestly feels like a chore. But guess what? That’s all on me. I can’t make anybody else accountable for that unless I am paying them to make that happen.
The Illusion of Flexibility
Do you remember my article, ‘Beyond the laptop on the beach‘?
When people hear remote work, they immediately think FREEDOM. Sure, I can work from anywhere but it doesn’t mean I am on holiday. My days are are often packed with work schedules and client demands. And unfortunately, family and friends may not always understand that you are working because, you are at home or at some location with your laptop (ever heard of a workation?)
Remote work doesn’t give you a ticket to do whatever you want with your time. In fact, it demands greater discipline with it.
Lack of Validation and Recognition
Unless you shout them out yourself, nobody is really going to see your small wins. This is why you always see some of us on LinkedIn or our Whatsapp statuses clapping for ourselves.
When you are working remotely or freelancing, there is no manager to consistently tell you “Good job!” There is no promotion for you to chase. You will need to create your own growth path and because that doesn’t look the same for everyone, that journey can get lonely.
There are some of us who are motivated by other people speaking positively about us and our work, but to be honest, in the world of remote, that may not always come. Sometimes you will not get the glowing testimonial, even when you would have done good work and gone above and beyond. It comes with the hustle. People are busy and they may just not find that time to put in a good word in for you without a nudge.
Chronic Decision Fatigue
I honestly sometimes loathe that I have to decide on EVERTHING by myself. Think pricing, clients, tools, systems, tasks, schedules…I could go on and on.
Constant decision-making can wear down one’s energy. It surely tires me sometimes (most times actually) because it doesn’t even end there. In the home I’m having to make decisions, in my life, in my son’s life. Sigh. Without a team that you can default some of the decision making to, paralysis can happen.
Late Payments and Ghosting Clients
You finish the work. You send the invoice. Then you wait…and wait…and wait.
Ask any freelancer and remote worker anywhere in the world, chasing payments can be exhausting and sometimes even disheartening too. Unfortunately, most aspiring remote workers I meet in Zim assume this is a potential problem if you work with Zim clients and then shy away from prospecting in this market.
But it’s a challenge that you can face with any client on this earth and there are varied reasons for this including clients experiencing late payments themselves.
Then there are cases of clients disappearing, and am not talking about payments. Sometimes they disappear with pending feedback, or content that would allow you to be able to wrap up the project. When clients ghost, it really can eat you up emotionally and even hit on your confidence levels because, whether we like it or not, we just can’t stop wondering, ‘What did I do?’ OK, this is true for me. Let me know in the comments how this makes you feel.
Comparing yourself to THAT freelancer on LinkedIn
This one is a disease that we need to heal from and it’s called Comparisonitis. I know, I know. Everyone looks booked, blessed, and busy on LinkedIn and other social media platforms. Meanwhile, you feel invisible.
Other freelancers are not sharing the realities of this path of working (even without the details) and they are painting a picture of abundance and ease.
Whether we like it or not, it’s easy to feel like there may be something you are not be doing right if you fall down that slippery slope of comparison and it may actual derail you from focusing on your unique goals and vision.
You will find yourself picking and dropping ideas and struggles instead of remaining focused on a mission where you would deliver the most value.
So why am I still doing this, you ask?
Because even with all the hard parts, there’s still something in it for me. There’s purpose. There’s growth. There’s freedom. Yes, it’s the kind of freedom that’s personal and meaningful to me.
Today I just wanted to tell the truth. The not-so-pretty side of this remote work life that doesn’t always make it onto Instagram or LinkedIn feeds. I will come back on another day with how to work through these struggles.
If you’re already in it and any of this hits home, just know that you’re not crazy and you’re definitely not alone. And if you’re thinking of going down this path, let this be your little warning label. It’s not all cute cafés and beach laptops. It gets messy sometimes.
But even on the tough days, I’d honestly still choose this life. I just have to remind myself to keep choosing me too.